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I would quote what I said, but my attempt at a joke sputtered out of me so poorly that I’m not even sure it made sense. Some sort of new, more clever joke to make up for my failed attempt at my original, semi-clever joke. In the past, I sulked away in this situation having embarrassed myself again. I sidled up near her, two stools apart, maybe three, as casual as I could muster.She looked up at me and there was a moment of silence between us so awkward, you could have stabbed me in the groin and I wouldn’t have noticed. But this time something in me snapped — or not snapped, but rather, something resigned itself.I sighed and said, “I’m sorry, I was trying to be clever.I just wanted to say hi.”The air eased between us a bit.Her disgust faded and she gave me kind of a friendly grin, “It’s OK. I guess.”I laughed, “No it wasn’t.”She laughed and I sat down next to her.

But women experience sexuality differently than we do, so it can be a bit more complicated and hard for us to decipher what makes them feel attracted to us. There are a number of ways to elicit emotion in a woman, and the way in which you go about eliciting that emotion will determine the quality and quantity (or lack thereof) of the relationships you have with women.

What’s I’m saying is this: you’ll find a lot of varying advice out there on how to attract women — some will say to tease them, some will say to be selfish and rude around them, some will say to buy them gifts, others will say to be cold and calculating — whichever of these avenues you choose to pursue with women, that is the corresponding relationship you’ll create.

If you choose to be cold, calculating and manipulative with women, you will naturally screen for women who will create a cold, calculating and manipulative relationship with you.

You can say the “wrong” things and still attract a woman.

You can say all of the “right” things and repel her.

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