Online dating first message compliment vs complement

Even more effective are phrases that engage the reader’s own interests, or show you’ve read their profile: Awkward, sorry, apologize, kinda, and probably all made male messages more successful, yet none of them except sorry affects female messages.As we mentioned before, pretty, no doubt because of its adverbial meaning of “to a fair degree; moderately” also helps male messages.A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online.It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening. But either way: men should be careful not to let the appearance of vulnerability become the appearance of sweaty desperation: , 23%)!When used as an adverb it actually does very well (a phenomenon we’ll examine in detail below), but as pretty‘s uses become more clearly about looks, reply rates decline sharply.You’re pretty and your pretty are phrases that could go either way (physical or non-).But very pretty is almost always used to describe the way something or someone looks, and you can see how that works out. After all, the way you choose to start your initial message to someone is the “first impression of your first impression.” The results surprised us: The top three most popular ways to say “hello” were all actually bad beginnings.Even the slangy perform better, bucking the general “be literate” rule.

Maybe they set a more casual tone that people prefer, though I have to say, You had me at ‘what’s up’ doesn’t quite have the same ring to it There are many words on the effective end of our list like zombie, band, tattoo, literature, studying, vegetarian (yes! ) that are all clearly referencing something important to the sender, the recipient, or, ideally, both.Talking about specific things that interest you or that you might have in common with someone is a time-honored way to make a connection, and we have proof here that it works.We’re presenting just a smattering: in fact every “niche” word that we have significant data on has a positive effect on messaging.We analyzed over 500,000 first contacts on our dating site, Ok Cupid.Our program looked at keywords and phrases, how they affected reply rates, and what trends were statistically significant.

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